30 Dec 2014

Past Entry 28

30th December 2012

Hi. I hope I'm doing okay at this point.

Here am I, this close to the day my IC gets "confiscated", addressing this to myself, when I'll be this close to getting my IC back.

I guess both cases are, in a way, exciting scenarios. I am, and will be, at a point of huge transition. The former is when I go from one uniform to another, and the latter when I get out of the other uniform too. I'm kinda getting sick of being confined to uniforms. Should I end up having to seek a job at a company I'd probably look for workplaces that allow fun casual clothing. Not that it'd be such a big deal if I work in uniform, but that I'd feel more like myself.

I really do hope I have a solid idea of which direction to head off next. Even typing this now I haven't done anything with regards to applications to universities. In fact I'm not sure if I even need to go to a university campus to acquire the qualifications that I make seek in the future.  

And now I've been wondering: is following my dreams/aspirations/inclinations necessarily the right choice?

It's quite the hot message being passed to and amongst youths. Don't force yourself to fulfill your relatives' or friends' wishes, just follow your passion. But does what I really like to do and what I should do always overlap? I've heard tales of those who do their jobs not necessarily because they liked to, but because they think they SHOULD do it. Like people who had to forgo their dreams in order to save a long-running business from going kaput. Or those who went against acting according to their aspirations to do more dangerous and demanding jobs like firemen or doctors or soldiers. 

How do I know I won't make the mistake of choosing to do something I think I'll really like to do, instead of what I really SHOULD be doing based on what I'm capable of?

With two years to think about such choices, I hope I made it clear to myself what I should do.

And if I still have no clue by then... do I just go with the flow? Just go around sampling courses and occupations like a taster? I fear many people would accuse me of wasting a lot of people's time and my own money like that. But frankly I don't see how I can get a clearer idea of the path I should set aside for myself, unless I go hands-on with what I'll have to deal with. 

Am I alone in my really hesitant decision-making?