12 Oct 2014

Rebinding

A little less than three months left. Then the gears shift into a new configuration.

I guess it won't be too abrupt since I've already been going for classes and doing projects. So I'm in touch with the studying environment. But it's still quite a change. And a somewhat liberating one at that. For instance, I'll get to use a camera-enabled device way more freely. And I'll finally not be required to report anywhere in some uniform.

But even that is still a short transition. University courses loom in the middle of the next year. And that's no simple feat. Not much time for you to catch up if you trip in the middle. It boggles my mind as to how some of these undergraduates can go for so many courses and still spread themselves in other extracurricular events. At least not without sacrificing a bit of sanity or vitality.

6 Oct 2014

Turning Wheels

I'm not a big fan of change that's beyond my control.

I like having agency and freedom. I like having the knowledge that would help me make the decisions to chart my path. It feels sucky when that kind of control and non-restriction is stripped away.

And right now, I feel swept up in some other person's large scheme again. Another pawn being manoeuvred out of will, to a space that I haven't picked, in order to fulfil a plan I don't know much about.